Finally Got it!

 Today was the beginning of getting back to normal... or at least I hope so!  My state finally made teachers eligible for the vaccine. We have been waiting patiently... ok not so patiently... to receive the vaccine. Today was the big day for me and many other teachers across the state.

I was very fortunate to find an appointment near me and on the first day.  I kept hitting refresh on the site until a slot opened up.  It was almost like back in the day when you would try and get concert tickets.  You know, how you would hit redial a bazillion times until you got through.  I was almost as excited about making the appointment as I was when I scored Garth Brooks tickets! Who would have thought that getting a vaccine appointment and the vaccine itself would elicit such happiness?!?

The entire process was pretty painless, in case you are wondering.  I signed in, filled out various forms, and answered the Pharmacist's questions. We were so busy talking that I didn't even realize that she gave me the shot!  It really didn't hurt at all.  Now, I will say that I could tell in the muscles of my arm pretty much right away.  They became pretty tight and stiff... almost like when you get a tetanus shot.  You have to wait for about 15 minutes after the shot to make sure you do not have an allergic reaction and then I was on my way.  That is the entire process!

I have been lucky so far!  I have some discomfort in my arm.  It is sore, tight but not overly painful.  Again for comparison's sake, it is like a tetanus shot.  I did a pretty calm workout this morning and will do a more rigorous workout this afternoon.  Hopefully, by then the stiffness will be gone!

So for those of you who haven't gotten it yet, and wanted a run down... there it is.  I am so happy to have made the first step towards getting back to normal.  

International Women's Day

 Today is International Women's Day... a day I didn't know existed until this morning!  I know our world has been shaped by many important women.  From early suffragists to current trailblazers, women have impacted society.  I think that the most important women in our lives - in my life - are the normal, ordinary women we meet every day.  We should celebrate those women... too.

I think back to the women who have made me who I am today, and there are quite a few women who have left their mark.  Some have made a positive impact and others... not so much.  I have been blessed to have such wonderful everyday, ordinary, hard-working women to celebrate.

My sweet mama was the biggest influence in my life.  To say that I miss her is a complete understatement... it's like saying you miss air when you can't breathe.  My mama showed me how to put others first, how to always see the best in situations, and how even when things are stacked against you, you keep pushing forward.  She showed me to be a mom, how to be a teacher and how to choose kindness.  I can only hope to be the kind of person... the kind of human she was.

My tough as nails grandma was the second biggest female influence in my life.  She showed me that women can be tough, yet soft.  She showed me to stand up for what I want and that is ok if some people don't like you.  She showed me how to cultivate friendship, how to eat chocolate with pleasure, and that butter in food makes it taste so yummy. My Grandma was an amazing lady!

Other people have helped me along the way.  My Auntie, my mom's sister, showed me that even through the loss of 2 children, your sister and your husband you can still smile.  She showed me how to love a sibling with all your heart, and how to find the fun in all things.  My sweet 21-year-old niece has shown me that even with the loss of her mother at a young age, goals are attainable and hard work pays off.  This girl is going places and I am honored to know her.  I can't wait to see what her future holds. Finally, my mother in law who recently has lost her daughter, her best friend and is battling cancer shows me that I can overcome anything.  That putting one foot in front of the over, doing what needs to be done, and finding laughter in dark times will make any situation easier. 

There are many others who I know or have known that have left their mark.  The women I work with every day prove that women can do anything.  I am so impressed with their collective effort to ensure that our students are receiving the best education that we can give them.  The resiliency, adaptability, and perseverance that my team of teachers has shown since last March is amazing!  What a great group of women.  I am impressed with the next generation of women... the young girls in my classes (currently and in prior years). They are kind, driven, hard-working, and can do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. We are in for a real treat when they become adults!

Throughout the world, every day, there are great women stepping up to the plate.  They are working, caring for their families, giving all they have to everyone.  They are the heroes of International Women's Day! Kudos to all the ladies out there! 

This Time Last Year

 I saw a meme as I was scrolling mindlessly through Facebook that said, "This was our last normal week."  Wow! Little did we know this time last year, we would be embarking on the last normal week of the foreseeable future.  How could we have predicted that all of the normal things that we did, all of the whining we did about our problems, the plans that we made for the week or weekend.... would be the last time that we did?

That just blows my mind! This time last year, I was excited about slicing and school. I was making plans for the weekend, for Spring Break, and for Summer.  The most exciting plans were made for a family reunion at Cedar Point amusement park for June... the first time in at least a decade that we all could go. My slices were about my kids in school, and my kids at home.  At least they were at the beginning of the week! As the week progressed you could see and feel the change in my writing, my emotions, and what was going on in the world around us. Little did I know what was coming!

As a teacher, we talk about history and how problems shaped the landscape of our country or even our world.  To be living through that history is quite another story.  We have made history in the last year and continue to make it as we navigate our way through this pandemic.  It causes me to stop and ponder how we will be remembered?  How will the people of the US be written about in the history books?  Will the pictures and snippets of information reflect what really happened or will it be a sensationalized version?  

I know that in our last normal week, we took things like family, friends, social lives, and toilet paper for granted. I mean seriously I could never have imagined the pure joy you feel when the toilet paper came back into the store or when you spot Lysol wipes! It was, and is, like winning the lottery!!  I hope that we have learned the importance of family, of friends, of seeing people's faces, and the strength that we gather from those things.  I hope that as we embark on this next year of the pandemic, that we don't forget the lessons that we learned, the joy we felt over the simple things, that when there is a will there is a way.  I hope we take away a feeling that as a collective society we can face hard things but come out the other side with a resilience and empathy that hasn't been seen since war times.  That this pandemic can make us the next Greatest Generation. 

Saturday Mornings

 Saturday mornings are made for sleeping in.

 Saturday mornings are made for a quiet cup of coffee and mindless social media scrolling.  

Saturday mornings are made for extra-long workouts.  

Saturday mornings are made for long walks with friends. 

Saturday mornings are made for catching up on all your shows.  

Saturday mornings are made for whatever you need them to be. 

What is your Saturday morning made for?

It's Happening

 The day had finally arrived.. the much-anticipated arrival of the baby chicks.  I saw the small cracks the night before and the excitement had built to an overwhelming crescendo.  I took a bazillion pictures from different angles so that I could see if the eggs moved or if the cracks got bigger.  I made sure the nest camera was on, and I left for school.

The drive to school seemed like a hundred miles instead of the fourth of a mile drive that it was.  The blistering wind did not faze me as I rushed into the building to get the live feed going.  The smartboard seemed to take forever to turn on and then, of course, the school firewalls blocked me from logging into the app.  I  quickly realized I would have to use the link I sent the kids... I can't find the link... OH MY GOSH.. whew I found it.  I clicked the link and there they were.. the eggs.  Everything was the same.. no new cracks that I could see. Glad I didn't miss anything!

The kids started to arrive a little bit later.  They couldn't contain their excitement.  They had all been watching the live feed before they left for school.  "Mrs. Garrison.. one egg has a crack!" "Mrs. Garrison, did you see that the crack is bigger?" " Mrs. Garrison,  an egg has a crack!"  And on and on the kids went as they entered our classroom with overwhelming excitement, joy, and wonder.  They stood transfixed at their desks or moving as close to the smartboard as they could get. I knew right then and there that we were not going to get much done.

We paused the feed for the morning announcements but quickly pulled it back up when they were over.  The blue and green groups quickly changed classes and sat transfixed watching our chicks.  'Oh my gosh.... that one egg is really rocking!" "Look, that one has a bigger crack!"  By now, we could tell that one of our eggs was going to hatch quickly.  I ran next door to make sure my partner teacher was watching.  She quickly stopped working on math and drew their attention to the smartboard.  

The eight kids with me (the poor target kids were missing all the fun- although, I did share the links with their teacher) were jumping up and down.  Like literally jumping up and down on the black and white carpet.  Squeals of delight could be heard from both classes... the noise increasing as the chick pipped his way around the egg. "Ahhh - look at that..." " Look, it's really cracking"  "OOOH - it has the egg open"  "Ahhhh - I can see it..."

Finally, our first little baby hatched.  It was so exciting... how many people can say that they watched a chick hatch?  We can!! What a wonderful experience for my fourth graders.  Needless to say, we spent the rest of the day watching our new baby get his "sea legs" and dry off.  But wait... is that another crack? 

Company's Coming

 Life is starting to slowly return to normal. Or at least it feels as if it is on the cusp of some normalcy.  It has been almost a year since the world abruptly stopped for so many of us.... for some people it has been even longer.  I have been reading my blog posts from last year with my classes.  It has been so surreal to read... such raw emotions.  The kids had so many stories about their experiences, what they remembered and how life is different.  It is almost like all of us have PTSD - or a mild form of it.

I have noticed how things that we couldn't fathom happening or getting used to are normal to us now.  Sometimes, I don't remember that I have a mask on and will get in the car and be miles down the road before I realize it.  A year ago, I would have never expected that to happen.  It is automatic for me to put hand sanitizer on when I get in the car after shopping or school.  I have washed my hands or put on hand sanitizer so much in the last year!  Who would have thought that we would carry hand sanitizer or Chlorox wipes with us everywhere... but we do!

We have begun to create a new normal.  It is normal to wear a mask... it is even almost weird to see someone's entire face.  It is normal to keep a safe distance from everyone... we even create more space if we feel uncomfortable.  It is normal to eat more dinners at home, to shop online, and to have zoom happy hours.  We have chosen to rise above Covid, to create routines that help us to get what we need from life and survive.

But change is on the horizon.  The vaccine is helping and as more people get the vaccine, the quicker we can return to what once was... or a version of that.  I can see it in my own family.  My in-laws had both vaccines and immediately scheduled a trip to see us.  It has been here in over a year since they have traveled.  My brother and sister-in-law received both vaccines and are coming to visit this week.  I haven't seen them since December of 2019.  I am so excited to have this little bit of normalcy. 

The store shelves are stocked with paper towels and toilet paper.  Who would have ever thought how exciting that would be?! Lyson is getting easier to find.  People don't feel the need to hoard these items as they once did.   It's not much but it is a little bit of normal... and we all need it. 

Wednesdays

 My school district has deemed Wednesday as an asynchronous learning day. On a side note, before last March did you ever use or even know what asynchronous was? I digress... Wednesdays are meant to be spent meeting with students either one on one,  in small groups, or in large whole-class settings.  Wednesdays can also be used for students to finish up incomplete work, take a test, or something along those lines.  Wednesdays are sort of like a catch-all day. If it needs to happen, it happens on Wednesdays!

(Even though Wednesdays are not a school day, our standards have remained the same.  We teach the same amount in a smaller amount of time.  For some, our Target (gifted) kids are still pulled for a day's worth of instruction.  So, I have some of my kids for 3 days a week... with all the same standards!)

For my team, we begin the day with our planning meeting.  I have been on this team for seven years and it has always been our goal to take a subject, plan it, and then share it with the team.  One positive from Covid is that we are finally doing that... at least to some extent.  We meet early in the day to share our resources, plans and answer questions.  We then move right into our CCC meetings, where we discuss data and all the things that need to be discussed.  These Wednesday meetings often last 2 hours! In fairness to us, we do not have time during the day to talk much and with Covid guidelines, we are not supposed to gather. 

I then move onto meeting with a small group of students to help with writing or reading skills.  It is a great opportunity to make an impact on these kids.  After that, I move to my whole group meetings where I meet for 30 minutes with one group and 30 minutes with another.  I tell you what, by noon I am exhausted!! The day is only half over and I have done nothing but work in front of a computer.

Our day continues after a quick lunch break with meetings - whether faculty, team, key teams, or something else.  Needless to say, Wednesdays are a FULL day.  For my school, this is not a rest day or a go play golf day.. this is a workday. Sadly, that can not be said for all schools or all people within a school.  I have actually heard stories of people playing golf on Wednesday.... which by the way is FINE!  We are all so tired and stretched so thin, if a round of golf eases the load - then golf away!

I say all of this for two reasons. One, I am curious how other school districts are doing this year.  Do you go to school five days a week?  We are a hybrid model - kids are virtual and in person.  The second reason I mention this is because I saw a social media post this morning asking teachers what they thought of having Wednesdays asynchronous next year.  It seems as if many like the break-in instruction and feel as if their kids are well-rested and can tackle more content.  The post got me thinking about whether I would like Wednesday to continue to be asynchronous or not.  Honestly, I don't know... I like aspects of it and then there are aspects I don't like.  The whole thing is above my pay grade... I will make the best of whatever schedule I have. 

Quiet Time

 I love the early morning quiet....the sound of birds waking up and the quiet hum of life waking up around me.  I love the stillness of it all and the hope that each dawn brings.  

I have always been an early riser, my internal clock seems to crave the solitude and quiet of the morning.  Currently, I get up a little after 4 to begin my day.  I start each day with a workout... a chance to get my mind right and my body prepared for what the day will bring.  I enjoy a quiet cup of coffee and scrolling through social media.  It is a mindless pursuit of stillness.  I know what the day brings for a teacher whether we are in the middle of a pandemic or not.

I even love the quiet of my school before people arrive.  I look out at the empty desks and anticipate the noise, laughter, and hard work that will happen today.  I can set my intention for the day, look over plans, and ease into the ever hectic life of a teacher. In all honestly, I can get a lot of work done before anyone else arrives and I have easy access to the copy machine!! I mean isn't that worth the early wake-up in itself!?!

I know that there are some who crave the late-night shift... maybe it's the adventure of it or maybe the late-night is calm and quiet for them. I can't begin to understand... I can't make it up past 9! I hope that everyone finds the time that their soul craves. Whether it is early morning, late at night, or a quiet moment in the afternoon.... we all should acknowledge the stillness, the quiet of our surroundings, and give our minds a rest.  We all deserve some quiet time. 

Well, here we go again.....

 Have you ever done something that you know is going to work out in the end but you really aren't sure about?  You know, that I should really do this kinda feeling but you can barely muster the energy or focus to do it?  That is how I feel right now about committing to the monthly challenge.  I know that it will be very rewarding when I am finished, but I am struggling to get my thoughts out. 

I think many of us find that we are stretched too thin, that our minds are spent, our bodies are tired and we just can't.  Just can't take one more thing.... just can't complete one more project... just can't stand the smell of Lysol... just can't.  We all have Covid fatigue.  We have been in a constant state of flight or fight since this time last year.  Taking on something challenging yet rewarding seems insurmountable.  

Yet, here we all are.  We have committed to making ourselves do something normal.  We have committed to honing our craft, of showing our students that even when things are hard you can do anything.  We will find joy in the camaraderie of our shared goal, of our shared passion for writing, of our shared desire to find some normalcy. We will become a community of writers.

So today and for the next 31 days, I will write this blog.  Some days will be rough, some will be wonderful and some will just be ok, but I will keep writing.  I got this... I am a teacher after all! 

The month of love...

 February, for most people, is the month of Valentine's day.  A month to declare your love for someone... whether a new flame or an everlasting flame.  For me, February is a month filled with hard memories. A month marked by the loss of one of my favorite people that ever lived.

Let me take you back two years.  My effervescent sister-in-law, my partner in crime for over 25 years was diagnosed with anal cancer.  Her cancer was caught early... actually before too many symptoms appeared.  She had fallen and broken her tailbone.  When the symptoms persisted, she went to see a doctor who immediately ordered a colonoscopy.  Much to our chagrin, they discovered her cancer. 

Being typical Laurel, she attacked her diagnosis with positivity and planning.  She was a major planner... just like me. She was scheduled for radiation and chemotherapy.  She met each appointment with positivity if not a little bit of apprehension at the discomfort and unbelievability of it all.  I mean, she was not even 50! Her chemo was the kind that you had attached to you for a week and then had a few day's break.  She endured this for 8 weeks.... and then she was declared cancer-free!

She had one more obstacle to overcome before she was done with the whole mess.  She was scheduled for an operation to remove any remnants of her cancer.  She was so young they wanted to ensure that nothing was left.  She had so many things left to do... why not make sure it is all out.  That surgery was scheduled for February 1st.

I remember the morning of her surgery, I texted her a picture of the chicks that had just hatched in my classroom.  Just trying to keep it normal for me and her.  Surgery went well, she came out with what we thought were flying colors.  We even joked with her afterward about what a pain in the ass she was... like literally now.  She sounded tired but so good... and of course, thought the whole joke was funny.  

Unfortunately, the rest of the story is not unicorns and rainbows.  Somewhere along the way, Laur developed complications from the colostomy bag that was attached during surgery.  She spent too many hours feeling horrible, vomiting, and not being able to eat.  She went to the doctor numerous times and finally to the ER.  She waited in the ER for way too long, too much time was wasted on trying to figure things out.  My fun, kind, never met a stranger sister-in-law was now in Septic Shock.  Just the sound of those words fills people with dread.  For those of us that loved her, they have become the equivalent of really bad four-letter words.  Like think of the worst one you know.... Septic Shock is worse than that!

She lost her battle with sepsis on February 13th.  Her body couldn't fight off the infection but boy did she try.  She would write notes to have the doctor answer her questions or to comment on how she was feeling. She died surrounded by the people she loved most in the world.  

So see, February is not my favorite month.  Each thing I do I remember what I was doing that last February.  When the kids do readers theater, I think about how I took those calls from my mother-in-law in the hall.  Of how I had to leave school during their plays.  February brings the start of Lacrosse, but all I think about was the boys missing practice to go to Florida.  I love my class's chicken project, but when they hatch I think about those texts with Laurel on February 1.  

I know that time heals all wounds and maybe February will become less painful as the years go on.  But for now, I will try and focus on the positive, good memories I have. I won't focus on the excruciating details of her last February but on all the times before.  Maybe those of you whose February is the month of love will hold yours just a little bit tighter this year.  

It's Been Awhile

 It has been a very long time since I have attempted to write this blog.  I hadn't realized that it had been months until I showed my blog to my students.  I was shocked to see that it had been that long and equally as shocked to realize how much I missed it.  I really need to make more of an effort to write!

So much has happened since my last blog.  My school district went from fully virtual to a phased approach back to the classroom.  Elementary went first, so I have been back in the classroom for almost seven weeks.  Kids were given the option to choose to return face to face or to remain virtual.  Teachers were asked to teach both the virtual kids and the face to face kids.  Needless to say, this has been a transition for us all! 

The kids have adjusted to all the new procedures and routines.  The virtual kids seem to be adjusting as well.  The teachers.... well.... we are doing the best we can.  It is extremely tiring to manage all of the things that we are being asked to do.  Each week it appears that there is something new to do or more children are joining virtually.  I don't think I have gone to bed this early in my life!! For so many people I know bedtime is moving earlier and earlier.... although some people's bedtime is getting later and later.  Weird how that works!

I do feel like we are getting back to some level of normalcy. Having kids in the building, hearing their laughter, watching them finally understand a concept.... are all such normal things.  Now, I know we all have masks on so it is not totally normal... but it is a start.  We have to capture these moments of our new normal and hold tight to them. 

We have to hold on to what is precious and to what makes us happy.  If I have not learned anything else from 2020, I have learned that time is fleeting, normalcy is precious, letting go of what was is paramount, and kindness is the answer.  Oh and don't hog the toilet paper or the Lysol wipes!!

I will write more... I will make more of an effort to embrace something that I enjoy.  It will not be three months before I blog again.... at least I hope not :) .